On A Roll...
June 19th, 2008 by Braddah LanceSo I'm back and much Mahalo's goes out to all who posted and emailed me offline as well wondering Wassap Wit Dat?!
We did get one Lurkah out, HauulaPoi54 (and da others who tune in on da North East side!). Everybody now.........
Aaaaaloooooooooooo-ha. E komo mai Braddah!
And I was just in Hauula too (driving by)...twice this week! Now I shmall kine chicken skin knowing get some peeps out dea with internet. 
Jus' joke Braddahs and Sistahs, had to throw dat out.
Dis blog might be a little long cause get choke "mini" stories but hea goes.
On Saturday at our baseball game we faced one of the top three teams in the league and I gotta say, my boys made me proud. They hung around for six of the seven innings (with the opposing coach "intensely" saying that they should be pounding the ball against us - WWD?) but again, with our players being so inexperienced, in the end they were just overwhelmed although we did limit the other team to only a handful of hits. Nice job guys!
But that wasn't the dramatic part. It started when one one of our players hit a shot to second base and it took a bad hop hitting the fielder on the side of the head. He walked off on his own and ended up being ok but you know how it goes, everybody is a little more wary.
A couple innings later as we're switching sides, the opposing pitcher is warming up (he throws hard) and the ball passes their catcher and heads to the backstop where the umpire is talking to the official scorekeeper. It takes an "unfortunate" bounce and bam! In da olo's! Bring in the backup umpire.
Then in the sixth inning, one of my bigger batters come up and since I'm a one man show, I have to keep stats/scorekeep and coach at the same time. As I finish talking to my second base runner (I'm in the coaches third base box) I look back down to update the score-book and I hear it...twack! By the time I look up I see this missile coming straight at me and with no time to react I try to deflect it with the book.
Missed.
It cracks me in my surgically repaired knee and I huli over in the air. In less than a second I get about ten adults hovering over me. After a minute of regaining feeling in my knee, I wrap an ice pack around it and suck it up. Game on.
Like they say, things happens in three's.
Then on Sunday at my league basketball game I popped my ankle pretty bad. It swelled up like I had cankles - you know, the calf and ankles look like one. Then of course being the lucky son of a gun that I am, hobble to my bike and lo and behold...the battery is dead.
Wasssssaaaaap Wiiiiiiit Daaaaaaaaat!
Good thing one of my friends was in the parking lot and gave me a running push so I could pop the clutch and off I went.
So there I was at home icing my grapefruit sized knee and my cankles and Da Wife walking through the living giving me "da look" (your fault, you get no sympathy from me, etc). Did I mention I had to meet the cousins an hour after that for an around the island tour? So I just wrapped it up, popped a few Aleve and off we went.
On Monday, after the constant nagging - uh, encouragment - from Da Wife to go to the doctor, I give in and lucky enough to get a cancellation spot. X-rays - negative for a break but Da Doc (one of the top orthopedics in the state so I listen when he talks) did show me something new. He said my ankle was "loose" and proceeded to pull my ankle away from my shin, "See, loose. You need to rehab."
Oh great.
And yes, I hear it all the time, "why don't you just wear body armor already?"
You tink you funny eh? 
So is this the beginning of the end? Is my "youth" finally "old"? Or has my "luck" just run out?
Anyone else running around "invincible"? Love pain?
Hard head?
June 19th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Wow look i'm first. WWD! Bruddah its a sign. YOU GETTING OLD!!. Time to start wearing braces and stuff. You not young anymore like us guys. HEHEHE. BTW hope your ankle is better, we need to get back into first place tonight so suck it up pop some pills and be ON TIME!. you and Scott for always come late. Catch you later.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:31 am
Oh, boy, braddah. Mo betta wear some bubble wrap and padding ALL OVER your body. At least this time you KNEW you had something wrong, instead of walking around with broken bones and not even knowing it.
Well, this means this bad stuff is all over, and you will be healthy and whole for the rest of the year.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:33 am
aigoo BL you falling apart!!!
but man oh man CANKLES!?! tooo funny it's not often you hear dat term used by a guy...at least not saying that he's the one with them haha
ahh, youth is all in the mind...look at all those super active seniors and compare them to the 20-somethings who have the aches and pains that border on arthritic! no worry Braddah you not un-youthful
oh and about hte body armor--no need! well, maybe just metal pants to protect your repaired knees & loose ankles...
June 19th, 2008 at 9:35 am
Time to switch to Mountain Ball and Bowling! And drive a Honda Accord 4 door.
You better talk to Rodney, MLC (Midlife Crisis) can't be far behind.
Jus joking! Keep going and don't give in. As long as you're still having fun.
June 19th, 2008 at 9:46 am
Whhhaaat? We ALWAYS on time.....Hawaiian time!
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Ha ha. But den people would confuse me and the Michelin man.
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Yeah, I am falling apart and held together by glue and duct tape. And cankles - das da only thing I was thinking looking at my foot. Sad yeah?
And da olo's too right?
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Already dea CW. Well not Mountain Ball, still playing 2 slow pitch leagues and my bowling league. Ha! Negative on da Accord - so I not at MLC yet...wen I start riding one Harley I going be though.
ALWAYS! If not, why do 'em?
June 19th, 2008 at 10:05 am
Good job with your baseball team! BL, hate to say it but you stay getting old.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:11 am
Midlife Crisis - open enrollment now in progress.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:14 am
At least you nevah get hit wea da umpire did!!! Wonder why dey no wea cup? Maybe dey no like have any mo kids.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Eh, Bruddah Lance.....
"So there I was at home icing my grapefruit sized knee and my cankles and Da Wife walking through the living giving me “da look” (your fault, you get no sympathy from me, etc)."
I say this in all sincerity "Welcome to the OLD and MARRIED club!" The signs are very subtle yet "WELCOME!"
OL
June 19th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Braddah Lance,
I know just how you feel. Completely tore my achilles just two years ago. Got that fixed, but ever since my achilles/ankle just doesn't feel the same, so I've been favoring one side and now that side knee is starting to feel "funny". All of this and not even 40 yet.
But I'm back to playing tennis and volleyball. But when I leave for my games, Da Wife always says "don't break anything", nothing like "hurry home" or "have a good game". I guess she didn't like having to do all the things that I normally did when I was ordered to stay off my feet.
Hope you're feeling better now...I'm sure you already know, it never seems to heal 100%.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:21 am
dude . . . maybe you should go MIA for awhile . . . too much physical injuries in one weekend! but i know . . . you "hard core", so you still going coach, play your games, and take the fams sight-seeing!!
i had some "love pains" the other day . . . i'm over it already though
NEXT!!
LOL . . .
June 19th, 2008 at 10:31 am
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You too funny! LMAOROF
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He is kinda on da "mature" side...
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Is your wife and Da Wife friends? Dey say da exact same ting! I tell Da Wife (if/wen I come home hurt), "see, you put da bachi on me. Your fault I got hurt!" ......No work. Still get "da eye".
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Exactomondo! Next!!!......just get da ice packs ready!
June 19th, 2008 at 10:44 am
Go Tiger....errr, Braddah Lance!
June 19th, 2008 at 11:02 am
Did you ask the umpire if he wanted some spam with his SCRAMBLED EGGS?
Did you call out, "2 balls, 1 STRIKE!" after it happened?
To make him feel better, did you give him a DVD of season 1 of the SOPRANOS?
Did you tell the opposing pitcher, "Hey, URINE trouble now!" for hitting him in the olowangas?
I think all your male readers squeezed their rectum and closed their legs the moment the read about the ball to the olowangas!
June 19th, 2008 at 11:06 am
Geez, louise... talk about go fo' broke, brah! No need get everyting one time! Aiya!
When you stay stuff like this: "It cracks me in my surgically repaired knee... " Uhh, yeah, you must be hard head, no? I know why Da Wife give you da eye! I gotta tell my husband sometimes "Remember, even though you did it before, your body is NOT AS YOUNG anymore! Sorry!" You no like be all creaky and stiff when you get old 'cause you neva take care!
June 19th, 2008 at 11:11 am
You just going through the "The older you get, the better you USED to be" phase.
June 19th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Aloha Bruddah Lance, first of all, congrats to your team for making you proud-reflects on your coaching...as fo the rest of it ..AI SOS!!! talk about all hemas....ai! and cankles? dang...are you hobbling around work den? hmmm i gotta watch and check you out. And no it's not a sign of getting old, it's just that you was in da wrong place at da right time and tank goodness wasn't in your olowangas. now if you got the stink eye from you wifee den she probably tell you....good fo you lol.
nah and yup i agree w/frankie when he said all da guys that were reading what happend to the ump.....WOOSH.....CLOSED THEIR LEGS TIGHT!!!! take care
June 19th, 2008 at 11:24 am
Yeah but da difference is he makes uku-bucks and I make ahh-shucks.
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No fo'get da squint eyes, teeth clenched suck wind through da teeth face. You too funny frankie!
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Wat if I already dea? Ho, dat means wen I do get "old"....I going be REALLY old!
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Oh is DAT wat it is? We already talking li'dat. "Hey you remembah wen we used to...."
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Yup! And going up and down stairs kinda shame gotta grab da rails.
You know Da Wife too?!
June 19th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Oh wow, you getting bus' up...take it easy BL. I remember back when, getting hit between the eyes while coaching first base. Had foul ball and just as I was turning around got hit by a cock arm lady trying to throw ball back to home plate. Saw stars and out for a sec. I was subbed out at first.
I old but still doing competitive sports. Like to do road races and tennis now. My glory years long, long gone. Main thing you alive and working out.
June 19th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
Braddah Lance,
WOW! I'm glad you still alive!!! After all dat?? AI YAH! Hope you feel better, OLD MAN! hehe.. nah.....just kidding! Uhhh.... I mean da old man part, I really do hope you feel better!
It was getting kinda boring not being able to read your blog for a few days, had been missing da laffs! But you obviously needed the "Break"!
June 19th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Wow, sorry to hear about what ails ya! I can't promise it will get any better!
J/K...take care of yourself. I am having surgery myself on Monday, so it'll be a couple of weeks before I comment again. Take care, BL!
June 19th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Yowza's! At least I seen mine's coming.
I old but still doing competitive sports. Like to do road races and tennis now. Das like two opposites - one running, one sitting. Road...you mean da track right?
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Mahalos! And you funny too eh? Hey, we got anoddah Lurkah out! Cheeee-hooo!
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Two weeks?! Holy Canole! YOU bettah take kea! Mine's is so manini! I'm sure from all da Lanceformers, Kwonics & Lurkahs - we hope all goes well and God speed on your recovery! You take kea and hope you feel da Aloha all da way from hea! And expect you back come two weeks!!
June 19th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
I have an injury to tell too. Yesterday as we were getting ready to go to Morton's for a free steak dinner, my dog was attacked by the neighbors 3 part bull dogs. I ran outside and grabbed the most aggressive one by the collar and lifted the front legs off the ground and tried to kick the other 2 dogs away from my dog. The next thing I knew, the dog that I was holding by the collar turned his head and bit down on my arm, I could see the two upper fangs go into my arm and I twist the collar as hard as I could to choke him and he let go, by then the owners came and got their dogs under control. The dog owner ask if I was okay and I told them I think I'm okay so I went to wash my wounds and found 4 puntures my my arm and 3 deep scratches from the top of my shoulders to my waist from the dogs paws. My other neighbor went to get the first aid kit, cleaned up my wounds, put anti bacteria onitment and bandaged me up. My wife said I guess we are not going to dinner and I told her let's get cleaned up and let's go, no dog bite was going to stop me from getting a free steak dinner at Morton's. A true Pake never passes up anything for free....oh yeah, the steak dinner was good.
June 19th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Wow M, that sounds terrible. I have 2 dogs myself and I fear an attack of that nature. Hope you heal well. Anyway, I'm 28 and I've been lucky not to have anything go wrong physically. Worst thing I guess is that at age 24 I basically gained 10 pounds overnight. They call it "filling out" and I hate that term. Worst part is seeing family who remember me when I was 20 and strong. Anyways, next week going on an Alaska cruise so I'll miss you regulars here. Forecast is 50 and rainy, but at least the beer stay cold. Peace out peeps!
June 19th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Your fingers still seem to functioning so I'm glad you au'ight but Braddah M, wat happended to your dog?
And you don't have to be pake to pass up a FREE dinner at Morton's...you'd have to be pupule!!! btw, wea was da invite?!?
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Actually I tink da worst is wen dey give you da once over and say - politely mind you - "wow, you really changed." Translation, "ho, Braddah, you FAT!"
OT: Alaska eh? Salmon and beer? You know, I hear a lot about Alaska cruises. Is it dat good? The only thing I think wen I hear 'Alaska' is glaciers, aurora borealis and salmon fishing.
June 19th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
BL, my dog is fine. I didn't find any injuires on her. When I was trying to protect her from the 3 dogs, I think she was trying to protect me from the 3 dogs. My dog is about 80 lbs., larger than the 3 dogs that was attacking her.
June 19th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Hey islandgirl in nc....take it ez and we'll spuk in 2 den huh. ahui hou malama pono
June 19th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Hey BL-
Good to see your injuries haven't broken your spirit! Just no give your rehab therapist one hard time, or else dey going give you "da eye" too! Maybe even drop a line here and tell us all what one panty you are when you trying fo to exercises! LOL
Islandgirl in NC - wishing you a speedy recovery!
June 19th, 2008 at 4:18 pm
hey bl,
i tink u got 2 tink bout da wife. she give u "da look" cause she stay worried bout u. what u do if u no can walk? i sure wit da korean blood u jus "suck it up" and life goes on. but u eva tink bout da wife and how she would feel if u stay broken? i sure da wife wuld still love u and take care of u, but can u live wit yourself for puttin da wife through dat. maybe u got 2 start 2 put da wife 1st be-4 ur yourself. what u tink?
June 19th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
islandgirl in NC - Hope all goes very well and you have a speeedy recovery! We'll be waitin' for your return!
Scott - Have a great vacation!!! My friend just returned from an Alaska cruise and he loved it! Enjoy!
M - Aiya!! Guess you have some battle scars!! At least you still got the steak dinner!!
BL - Your comment "Actually I tink da worst is wen dey give you da once over and say - politely mind you - “wow, you really changed.” Translation, “ho, Braddah, you FAT!”" was so true, but too funny! LOL!!
June 19th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
islandgirl...speedy recovery and be back soon.
M...you take care too. I think your neighbor got amends to make. Another free Morton's steak?
June 19th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
Eh M, I hope you ok......so what you going be the nice guy you also ways are and let it go........take care, betta go c the doc to b sure...
June 19th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
40's the new 30 - yea right! i hurt my back just trying to squeeze out a fut. getting old sucks. but, like my uncle told me, you can't beat father time, but you can trying to doing it gracefully. keep strokin' 'um!!
June 20th, 2008 at 7:22 am
NKHEA, I'm okay, the other neighbors are telling me to call the cops. I'm not mad at the neighbors dog or the dog owners so I'll just let it go. No like make trouble.
June 20th, 2008 at 8:00 am
just an opinion:
i hurt my back just trying to squeeze out a fut.
o my! just an opinion: tmi....lol so if was it for a leetle futter or a loud KABOOM kine futter...lol.....
BL where are you come out and play,,,,,
June 20th, 2008 at 8:10 am
I bet you had these things happen to you just so that you could your nagging - umm, encouraging, loving--- wife to wait on you hand and foot...
June 20th, 2008 at 8:51 am
Das good to hear!
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You tink I actually going tell you I wen cry?
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Da Wife tink you funny! She was cracking up last night. She knows I put her before anything else but she also knows dat she married me for who I am - not fo' wat she can change me to be. It's just like Tiger no golf or Kobe no basketball. You know it ain't going to happen cause das what makes them the person they are. She knew dat coming in and she's cool li'dat...das why we married!
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See! Anoddah one! Somebody clue me in on dis!
C'mon, you should know me by now...I tell it how it is!....most of da time.
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LMAO!
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Whhaaaa? You nevah hire Mr.Green? Oh yeah, you get some class.
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Peek-a-boo
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Not even close! She da very one telling me suck it up! Da only thing she "wait" fo' is fo' me to move my fat a$$!
June 22nd, 2008 at 12:53 am
Aloha Kakou!
Its so nice to see a real command of the Hawaiian Creole English on the web. Its very refreshing. Heal, take care bumbai you goin be writing bout um again.
And no mine all da mahus you see in H-town...no be scaade even though they 6'2'' and weigh 2 more times den you...but no play volleyball wit dem...you goin get six pack'd guarantee...
And what is this lurkahs stuff? No sound too good....
Always looking forward to more WWD posts...
Ahh-loha...